My Name is of No Consequence

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Posts by My Name is of No Consequence

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  107

  I have a serious problem

  by My Name is of No Consequence in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  i have a serious problem that i cannot solve on my own.

  i was born-in but am only in by a thread at this point.

  i quit the tms a few weeks ago and wrote a post on it.

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  My Name is of No Consequence

  Well, I met with the brother and told him that EVERYTHING involving him and my son will and must go through me and that includes the study. He agreed to "back off".

  I made the mistake of telling my wife about the conversation. She is not happy. She basically told me that if I was "spiritually strong", no one would have to pick up the slack as far as headship (as seen through the eyes of the witnesses) goes.

  It got so bad between us that I spent last night at a motel. Yeah, this religion as done wonders for my family.
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  107

  I have a serious problem

  by My Name is of No Consequence in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  i have a serious problem that i cannot solve on my own.

  i was born-in but am only in by a thread at this point.

  i quit the tms a few weeks ago and wrote a post on it.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
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  My Name is of No Consequence

  @ AudeSapere

  It is not clear from your comments which relationship(s) you are trying to hold on to.

  My wife, son, parents, cousins, aunts, uncles and grandmother. I am a 3rd generation born-in.
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  107

  I have a serious problem

  by My Name is of No Consequence in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  i have a serious problem that i cannot solve on my own.

  i was born-in but am only in by a thread at this point.

  i quit the tms a few weeks ago and wrote a post on it.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
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  My Name is of No Consequence

  @ 3rdgen

  MNIONC didn't even tell us that it is his stepson, yet that fact is relevant.

  I did state this fact.
• 
  107

  I have a serious problem

  by My Name is of No Consequence in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  i have a serious problem that i cannot solve on my own.

  i was born-in but am only in by a thread at this point.

  i quit the tms a few weeks ago and wrote a post on it.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  My Name is of No Consequence

  I am meeting with him this weekend and I will tell him how I feel about him "taking over". I will be respectful like I usually am, but firm. After that, everything having to do with the organization, my son and him will go through me. If this doesn't work, I will go up the food chain. I am tired of being the doormat in my own house and it has to stop.
• 
  107

  I have a serious problem

  by My Name is of No Consequence in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  i have a serious problem that i cannot solve on my own.

  i was born-in but am only in by a thread at this point.

  i quit the tms a few weeks ago and wrote a post on it.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  My Name is of No Consequence

  @ OnTheWayOut:

  I have enjoyed your posts for years. I appreciate your insight, perspective and knowledge and I respect you as a senior member of this forum. When I see your posts and comments, I read them. With that being said, I joined this forum because I thought that I could contribute to it and offer a unique perspective into the current mindset of the witnesses because I am still in. I am having a difficult time with this situation and needed suggestions on how to handle it. On the outside, it seems pretty cut-and-dry on what I should do. However, with all of the caveats, I MUST proceed with caution.

  I may come across as somewhat weak and incisive. Maybe I am. Or maybe I am just super cautious because I know what this organization is capable of doing. As much is I would like to tell this elder - the pioneers, the elderettes, the circuit overseers, the district overseers, the governing body, yes everyone involved - exactly how I feel about them, I can’t do that right now. I don’t want to lose my family.
• 
  107

  I have a serious problem

  by My Name is of No Consequence in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  i have a serious problem that i cannot solve on my own.

  i was born-in but am only in by a thread at this point.

  i quit the tms a few weeks ago and wrote a post on it.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  My Name is of No Consequence

  @ user100:

  He is definitely going to college. That is one thing his mother and I agree on.
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  107

  I have a serious problem

  by My Name is of No Consequence in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  i have a serious problem that i cannot solve on my own.

  i was born-in but am only in by a thread at this point.

  i quit the tms a few weeks ago and wrote a post on it.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  My Name is of No Consequence

  I want to tell this elder that I do not want him studying with my son period. But I fear that that the blowback will be severe. My son wants to study with him and my wife is all in as well. Really, all relationships in my house have been strained and if I stop this study completely, it will get worse. She even said that his study would not be stopped even if some other brother is studying with him.

  How am I supposed to get around that? I am not ready to disassociate myself nor am I ready to get disfellowshipped. I still have a lot of family that are still "in" and I am just keeping up appearances at this point. It is going to be hell either way.

  I did not want to mention this, but he is my stepson. I have been his father for over half of his life. his mother would have more legal rights then me and she knows that. If I got disfellowshipped, I will probably have no legal standing to stop his study.
• 
  107

  I have a serious problem

  by My Name is of No Consequence in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  i have a serious problem that i cannot solve on my own.

  i was born-in but am only in by a thread at this point.

  i quit the tms a few weeks ago and wrote a post on it.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  My Name is of No Consequence

  Thank you all for the suggestions. I certainly don't see myself as a victim. I don't think like that. I'm just not sure how to handle the situation. I'm having a hard time believing that this brother is purposely striping my authority and dignity outside of my home as well as inside. But all evidence points to the contrary.

  I texted this brother last night and said that we need to talk THIS WEEK. He texted that he would get back to me. We'll see what happens.
• 
  107

  I have a serious problem

  by My Name is of No Consequence in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  i have a serious problem that i cannot solve on my own.

  i was born-in but am only in by a thread at this point.

  i quit the tms a few weeks ago and wrote a post on it.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  My Name is of No Consequence

  @ label licker:

  Thank you for your suggestions. The brother sold the car to my wife for our son. He didn't give it to her but she claims she got a "good deal". I am upset about it because I didn't find out until after the deal was done.
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  107

  I have a serious problem

  by My Name is of No Consequence in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  i have a serious problem that i cannot solve on my own.

  i was born-in but am only in by a thread at this point.

  i quit the tms a few weeks ago and wrote a post on it.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  My Name is of No Consequence

  @ Oubliette:

  I appreciate your suggestions. Let me ask you something: Have you ever been in this situation? Maybe you have. It is easier said than done to "grow a pair". When the whole system is against you and you have no one to talk to directly about your feelings, it is extremely difficult. Every time I put my foot down, it gets stepped on not only by my wife but by this elder as well. I could try to be a tyrant and an a-hole to my family, but would that really solve anything?